I had been hoping with all of my heart that his therapist hadn’t recognized me, but deep down inside I knew that she did. It was a bold move but I was prepared to do whatever I needed to in order to protect what was mine. I loved Khalil and I was carrying his child now and nothing or no one was going to cause us any trouble.

I couldn’t stop laughing to myself at the look on his face when I told him. He looked as if he was going to pass out and when he couldn’t catch his breath we both realized that he’d enjoyed too much excitement for one day. It’s not every day your one-chance-in-a-million dream comes true and then you come home to find out you’re having a baby all within a few hours’ time.

A soak in the huge tub and a glass of cognac had calmed him. I’d bathed him and then had him sit on the edge of the tub as I’d given him the blow job of a lifetime. By the time I finished with him he was so relaxed he could barely move. I prayed that I would feel the same level of relaxation once I handled the business that I had at hand.

 

I walked into Cameron’s office before she had taken her first patient. She was behind the counter, talking to her receptionist, when she looked up and saw me standing there. Her eyes squinted a bit as if she was trying to adjust her sight. “I’ll just need a minute,” I said.

She waved me in. “Hold Mrs. Lords if she arrives before I’m finished,” she barked to her receptionist.

We walked into her office and she didn’t elect to sit down. I took a seat without her offering one and crossed my legs. “I need to know where you and I stand.”

“You need to know if I’m going to mention to Khalil that you’re a call girl.”

“Formerly. I was a call girl formerly.”

“Well you were on duty a few nights ago.”

“I’m sure you know that I canceled the appointment and I told your husband the reason why.”

“My husband?”

“Oh, that wasn’t your husband?” A smile came across my face. I believed now that we both had something to hide.

“My husband and I are separated. He was just someone that I’ve been dating.”

“And you were comfortable enough to get down like that?”

“Are you judging me?”

“Not at all. It’s just a little strange.”

“Well isn’t this whole thing?”

“Well he mentioned to me that you were his wife, on the phone.”

“You and I know that people say things that aren’t true all the time. Now don’t we?”

“I just need to know if you’re planning to mention this, because if you are then I’d like to tell him first.”

“Hmmmm,” she said, nodding her head. “So he only deserves to know if someone else is threatening to tell him. That’s the only way that you believe he’s good enough for the truth?”

“It’s not about that. You’re a woman and don’t sit up here all high-sidity, acting as if you don’t have any secrets. Not after seeing you so willing to ménage with someone outside your marriage. And, baby, I’m sure that wasn’t your first trip to the freaky side.”

“Hold up…”

“You hold up. I’m pregnant by Khalil and I need to know if I need to have this talk with him, because I don’t want to raise a child without a father.”

I wasn’t sure where she got the nerve but what came out of her mouth was: “Are you sure it’s his child?”

I jumped up and pulled my hand back to slap her right across the mouth but when she flinched from fear, I caught myself. “I’m sorry.” I took a step back. “I’m sure it’s his child. I haven’t been with anyone other than him since the first time he and I slept together and I’ve always had safe sex.”

I looked at her and saw the look on her face and it dawned on me right then. “You have feelings for Khalil?” She didn’t respond. “Have you ever been involved with him?”

“No.” Her words were soft, she sounded defeated.

I moved toward her. “Please don’t lie. If you’re lying then I can’t trust you.”

“I don’t owe you anything. You don’t have to trust me…” Maybe it was the hormones, or perhaps just anger, but I swung for her face. She jumped back out of the way and I missed. “I’m calling the police,” she screamed.

“No, please don’t,” I begged. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me…” I began to cry. “I just love him so much. I’m so sorry. I’m so…sorry,” I whimpered as I covered my face with my hands. “I just love Khalil.”

“He loves you too,” she said. I looked up at her. Her face looked calmer. She handed me a Kleenex. “Let me ask you this. Are you sure you’re going to stop doing this?”

“I already have. I swear.”

“This might sound strange coming from me, but have you been checked out for…”

“Absolutely. Every three months, and I am completely clear and disease-free.”

“It’s just that I care for him and I want him to be happy and…” she paused. “Khalil’s been through a lot.”

“I know and I’m going to change all of that. Not only do I love him, I can take care of him in a lot of different ways.”

“Financially?” she said. “Khalil has a lot more needs than that.”

“Please don’t sit up here and tell me about my man.”

She sat down and reached into a drawer on her desk. “I won’t tell you about him.” She pulled out a folder and thumbed through the pages like a bank teller flipping through money. Then she stopped at one page and nodded her head. “I do however think you have a problem.”

“And what might that be?” Our stares were now locked.

“In a session some time back, Khalil confided a bit of information that right now tells me that this whole thing is about to get very interesting.”

“And what might that be?”

She closed the folder and put it away with a smirk on her face. “Khalil once told me that there was a chance he was sterile.”

“Well…” I rubbed my belly and added, “We know now that he’s definitely not sterile.”

“Well I guess that remains to be seen,” she said smugly. I was beginning to think that she was the one who needed counseling. She’d gone from professional to compassionate to hostile and wound up at condescending. I believed that in light of her feelings for my man, she didn’t know how to feel.

I resisted the urge to call her out of her name and stood up. “I’m leaving, but I just want to know what to expect.”

“Khalil has made it clear to me that he won’t be coming back. So as far as I go, expect nothing,” she said as I walked toward the door. Then, if my ears weren’t playing tricks on me, I believed she mumbled, “Expect everything.”

When I glanced back she wasn’t even looking up. I shook it off and headed out.

 

The Realtor who’d found my new house in Maryland had put me in touch with her sister-in-law in New York, who, along with her husband, owned commercial real estate all over the country. I was hoping that she’d have something perfect for me in Atlanta or Miami that I could use for my boutique. When she called back a few days after our initial conversation, it was easy for her to get me excited when she told me that she’d been able to find a great location for my store; the only catch was that it was in New York City. As if she cared, I posed the question to her. I actually asked her how I was going to have a baby, open a boutique in SoHo, and keep my man happy.

Her response was: “Sweetie, I couldn’t tell you that. All I can tell you is that this location has made two previous tenants a mint selling shoes and clothing. There’d be very little build-out for you as the place looks fabulous.”

I’d wanted to tell her then that I’d take it, but what I did promise to do was drive up in the morning to take a look at it.

I was meeting Khalil for dinner to talk about the whole thing before he left for the West Coast for a few days of meetings with his distributor. We agreed to have a meal at Clyde’s in Chinatown. I beat him there and when he walked in, my heart melted as usual because of his beauty. He moved toward me with pride in each step.

“You’re looking really dapper,” I said. He was wearing a Façonnable shirt that I’d bought for him, a tan blazer, and a pair of perfect-fitting jeans that had him looking like he’d jumped out the pages of GQ.

“Thanks, baby. You’re not looking too shabby yourself,” he shot back as he leaned in for a kiss.

We both seemed to play with our food while I discussed my news. Khalil’s face didn’t show approval so I asked him, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Just thinking about the things you said.”

“I don’t have to…I mean…we won’t have to live in New York. I just think that I could make a lot of money there.”

“I know we haven’t discussed this yet but how does this work if you have a baby?”

“What do you mean if I have a baby? Do you not want to have a baby?”

He was silent for a minute and stared down at the table. “Honey, I need to tell you something.”

“Go ahead.”

“When I was molested, the woman who did it to me gave me a disease. I was young and didn’t know to seek treatment. By the time I did the doctor told me that there was a chance that I’d be unable to have children. That I could be sterile.”

I’d heard this from Cameron, but hearing it from my man seated across from me at the table with tears in his eyes almost caused me to break down. My heart was tearing in two as I leaned in and took his hand. “Listen, Khalil. I don’t care what the doctor told you then. If I can carry this child then you will be a father.” He pulled his hand away and I gathered quickly that he was doubting my words. In that I knew that he needed to hear what I had to say. “Khalil, look at me.” His teary eyes were now locked on mine. “I haven’t been with anyone else since we made love the first time. This is your child.”

As I spoke the words I thought about Miles Amory, my last client, and the broken condom. Then just as quickly I dismissed it, thinking that life couldn’t be that cruel. “Khalil, whatever your doctor told you back then was wrong. Your boys can swim,” I said and felt relief when he cracked a smile.

He took my hand again and said, “I’m happy.” Though his face showed the weight of the world, he seemed to be convinced that I was telling the truth.

We finished our dinner as I outlined a plan as to how it would work. We were going to be a power couple, like Russell and Kimora, Jigga and Beyoncé, Bill and Hillary, no less. By the time we paid the check and were heading out he was saying things like “As long as you know the baby has to come first.”

It warmed my heart as I felt it all coming together. He’d parked in the garage and I’d used the valet. “I’ll drive you to your car,” I insisted.

“Cool,” he said.

Khalil handed the ticket to the attendant and he headed off to get the car. As usual we caught the oohs and aahs of bystanders as the car pulled up. The black paint shining like a piece of art. It was a showstopper. I handed the attendant a tip and started for the car when I heard a voice come from behind me. “So this is what you’re wasting my money on?”

I looked back and saw none other than Priest Alexander and two of his cronies standing behind me. I tried to ignore him and headed for the door but he began to follow me. It was then that Khalil realized that he was talking to me. “C’mon sweetie, let’s go.”

“Don’t rush off on my account, I’m sure your man knows all about your scheme.” He was close enough for me to smell liquor on his breath. I looked out the corner of my eye and saw Khalil headed around the car toward us. “Awww man, what you gonna do? You wanna fight me over this money-hungry whore?”

With that Khalil charged him and was about to swing when two of the valet attendants jumped between them. “Please, sir. Not in front of the restaurant.” Seemingly out of nowhere the whir of sirens shot out from the corner and a D.C. squad car approached.

Priest stepped back from my side of the car and as he moved back toward the sidewalk he said a quick “Nigga, you lucky.”

“Let’s go,” I said one more time. Without a doubt I’d have some explaining to do and as my blood boiled inside of my veins I shot death eyes in the drunken fool’s direction, which screamed out to him that I’d be returning the favor. We both climbed in and as I was about to pull off I got the chance to eyeball him one last time. The look on my face let Priest know that he’d just made a mistake.

A serious mistake.