While having sex with Janette one night Nate looked down at his own stomach and couldn’t believe the condition he was allowing his body to slip into. He had never been so out of shape in his life. Lying in the aftermath of lovemaking, he ran his hands over his stomach and sides and felt the love handles that were beginning to form at his midsection. He was disgusted. Then he looked over at Janette, dozing off, happy and confident with her ample size, and decided that he could never be all right with his pudginess. While he still longed for control over his up and down emotional state, he knew that his physical condition was one thing that he could control. That night’s self-reflection had finally prompted Nate to act.

The laps were getting easier each day for Nate. He had gotten a gym membership and was making good use of it. It was his fourth week of working out and he had shed ten pounds already. What had been a big help was that on his second day at Run n’ Shoot he had met Larry Lawson. Larry was a big man; he threw the javelin at the University of North Carolina in the nineties. Now he spent his days working as a personal trainer part-time. He’d also told Nate he was active at his church.

Nate was struggling to get to his two-hundredth crunch of the afternoon when Larry came over and started barking in his ear. “Come on, Nate. Suck it up. You can do it. No pain, no gain.” Painfully, he pulled it together and yanked his body up.

“Two hundred.” Nate yelled and then stood up to grab his towel. He was drenched in sweat.

“Good job. You’re a natural, bro.” Larry said, giving Nate a pound. “You could do the same thing, you know?”

“What’s that?” Nate asked.

“Train folks. You have this workout down to a science. You have more drive than anyone I’ve ever seen. When you first came in here you couldn’t do thirty crunches. Now look at you.” Nate’s body had started to come back. He was working out with a vengeance. His grandmother had come to town for a visit and told him that he looked like shit. She had told him to get himself together and most importantly to get a haircut. While he had started working out, he still hadn’t visited a barber. He looked a lot like R. Kelly did when he pulled his braids out. Afro Almighty.

Responding to Larry’s comments, “I enjoy working out. I had gotten away from it for a while. To be honest I had been kind of depressed, but I’m starting to feel a little better.”

“Of course you do. Working out allows you to release some stress and releases endorphins.”

“Endorphins?”

“Yeah, those are the body’s natural happy juices. Working out has been scientifically linked with the release of them endorphins in the bloodstream.”

“Cool. I need all the happiness that I can get right now.” Nate said.

“It’s funny that you say that. I noticed from the time that we met that your heart seemed heavy. Anyone who spends any time around you can tell that you’ve been carrying a lot of weight on your shoulders.”

“Really? It shows?”

“Yeah, it does,” Larry said, peering straight into Nate’s eyes. “Listen, Nate, I don’t want to be pushy, but I’ve got a spot that I want to take you to. All I need is a couple hours of your time. I’ll even feed you afterward.”

Without thinking about it Nate answered, “Sure, man, where to?”

“It’s a surprise. But let me get your address and I’ll pick you up on Sunday morning.”

Nate knew where this was headed, but it was too late to back out. “Church?” Nate asked.

“The best one in the state of North Carolina.” Larry wrote down Nate’s address. “So I’ll see you Sunday morning.” Larry was smiling ear to ear.

“No doubt.” Then Nate thought about Janette. “Would it be all right if I bring along a friend?”

“Don’t be silly. We always have room for more in the house of the Lord.” Larry gave Nate a pound and was about to head for the locker room. “Be blessed and remember one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“Between now and Sunday you are going to find ten reasons why you shouldn’t come to church, and if you fight the spirit of doubt off, then be ready for the devil to throw five more obstacles in your way.” He placed his hand on Nate’s shoulder and added, “Just keep bobbing and weaving. Just don’t give up the fight. I have a feeling that this could change your life.”

Larry’s words rang through Nate’s head and in that instant he was determined to make it. He hadn’t been to a church in almost ten years. The closest he had come to attending church were the Sundays that he had to drive his grandmother to church. She was the one person who commanded his respect but even her request for him to attend had fallen on deaf ears. With the life that he had lived, getting up on Sundays had never been a consideration.

For a couple of reasons, Nate felt compelled to accept Larry’s invite. Though he had tried to fight admitting it, there was no denying that Nate wanted to atone for his part in Kim’s death. He also felt that something was missing in his life and deep down he held some hope that there might be an answer for him in church, but most of all he appreciated Larry’s help as a workout partner and didn’t want to offend him. As soon as Larry left, Nate decided to find a barbershop and headed to Southpoint Mall to hit Belk’s and Nordstrom’s to find a suit. He had left his entire wardrobe behind and only shopped on an as-needed basis. Up to this point he’d had no use for a suit.

Janette had been up since seven thirty. She’d been to the grocery store and back by the time Nate woke up. When he finally stirred from the bed, Janette had prepared him a plate with sliced fruit, a bagel, and turkey bacon. Janette’s body cringed from desire when she saw his naked body come into the kitchen. She had asked him not to a hundred times but as usual he took the Sunny Delight from the fridge and held the bottle to his lips. Janette watched the muscles in his throat as he chugged the juice down. He had lost all the weight that she had put on him.

She placed the sports page on the table next to his breakfast. Then she pretended to be interested in the sale paper as she sat and watched him. His hair was cut close, not bald, as he had worn it when they met. His goatee was neatly trimmed and she noticed that his dark skin shone as if he had had an expensive facial. He had.

Janette didn’t say anything about Nate’s appearance. She had seen his rapid transformation back to a model-quality physique. She would have lied if she said she didn’t feel a little insecure about him restoring his self back to optimum status. She also felt a little bad that she hadn’t taken the initiative to start working out as well. It made her wonder if it was just a matter of time before he grew tired of her thick girl lovin’.

“I’m going to get dressed. I’ll lay your clothes out for you,” she said as she walked past him. She had on a mid-cut silk robe and her breasts were bouncing freely inside. Part of her was hoping that she would arouse him to the point where he would come and take her, but when he never looked up from the Observer sports section, she realized that his mind was somewhere else.

“Okay. I’m right behind you.”

When Larry arrived at ten o’clock sharp, Nate was surprised to see that he was driving a burgundy twenty-passenger luxury bus with the name GREATER CHARLOTTE WORD CONGREGATION on the side of it. Nate yelled to Janette and she came to the door, purse and Bible in hand. She hadn’t been to church in ages but welcomed the chance to get back into it. She’d been raised in the church and often thought about finding a new church home. She took Nate’s suggestion as a sign to finally start.

“Man, you are looking cleaner than the board of health,” Larry said as he greeted Nate. Nate laughed and shook Larry’s hand. “And good morning to you, lovely lady.”

“Good morning.” Janette replied.

There were almost fifteen ladies, most of them elderly, and a couple of small children on the bus. Everyone spoke as Nate and Janette took a seat. “You two are in for a treat. My brother is preaching today. He came down from Washington, D.C. He has his own church up there, but he brought his choir down for a concert that we had last night and today he is going to bless us with a presentation of the Word. He is out of sight. I promise you won’t forget it.”

“Is that so?” Janette asked.

“You’ll see. You won’t regret coming today, not one bit.” Larry said and winked at Nate.

As the bus moved up Speedway Avenue, Nate sat back, closed his eyes, and leaned his head against the window behind him. He was trying to remember the last time he had gone to church, or prayed for that matter. Thoughts of Kim slowly crept into his mind. It still bothered him that he didn’t attend her funeral. There was a distinct possibility that he would have met his own death at the hands of a few of her cousins, but what weighed more in his decision not to show up was the fact that deep down, he felt responsible for her death. She was so young and beautiful, but she made one huge mistake. She fell in love with and gave her heart and soul to Nate. He swallowed hard and tried to fight back the feelings of guilt that began to consume him. Just then he felt a slap on his knee.

“Wake up, nigga.”

Nate opened his eyes to see a little kid no more than eight. Shocked, he said to the kid, “Excuse me?”

“No sleeping in church. That’s what my grammaw be saying.” Just then an older lady called up from a few seats back.

“Boy, get your tail over here. Leave that man alone.”

Nate felt compelled to interject. Though he didn’t feel like being bothered with the kid, he said, “Ma’am, he’s fine.” Then he turned back to the boy. “So what’s your name?”

The kid stared at Nate and replied, “Man, why you all up in my business?” Just that quick the kid turned and walked back to the rear of the bus to go irritate someone else.

Nate’s face turned into a scowl and he made a mental note to stick his foot up the little boy’s ass the first chance he got. He couldn’t believe how awful these kids had gotten today.

The church was a renovated grocery store. There was still a sign out front that said Winn-Dixie and there was evidence of construction all over the grounds. Larry explained that the congregation had only been in this location for two months. His brother, Reverend Lloyd Lawson, had purchased the building for their congregation. He explained how Lloyd’s church was doing really well. So well, in fact, that they had been able to build a church from the ground up near 7th Street in northeast D.C.

The space was adequate for now but wouldn’t be large enough for long if the congregation continued to grow at its present rate of almost thirty new members a month. Still, it was a step up from the gymnasium and folding chairs at the high school where they had held their services prior to moving here.

“Amen.” The church erupted. Every one of the four hundred people in attendance was stomping, shouting, and singing and the choir was just getting warmed up. The service hadn’t even started yet. The organ was humming as Larry led Nate and Janette to their seats three rows from the altar and headed off.

After a few moments the organ faded out and only the voices of the choir echoed. There was angelic harmony as they began to sing “He Is My Rock.” Two teenage boys came out. One lit candles and the other tested the microphone. Suddenly the church grew silent as everyone stood. Nate’s mouth dropped open when he saw what happened next.

Larry walked out from the back door with a full minister’s robe on. A second man, who was even larger than he was, followed and took a seat behind the pulpit as Larry addressed the church. “Good morning.”

“Good morning,” everyone said in unison.

“So blessed are we in this day that God has made. So blessed are we to be here today.”

“Amen” came from all over the church.

Larry surprised Nate as he took command of his congregation. They had been working out for a month and Larry had never once mentioned that he was the pastor. Nate began thinking back, trying to recount each conversation that they’d shared. He was hoping that he hadn’t insulted Larry at any point with vulgarities. In his favor was the fact that he hadn’t had much to brag about the entire time he was in Charlotte. He had been a one-woman man.

It was clear that Janette was impressed that Nate was friends with a pastor. She had no idea that it was just as much of a shock to Nate. After about ten minutes Larry announced that he was going to hand the pulpit over to his brother. “This man is responsible for getting us into this building, and for buying the bus that I have been using to get so many of you here. He is more than just a pillar of our community, his community. He is someone who is worthy of the title reverend, but most importantly, folks”—the congregation’s applause made it hard for him to finish. He yelled into the microphone—“Most importantly, he is my big brother. Welcome him with love…. All the way here from the nation’s capital, Reverend Lloyd Lawson.” The congregation was standing and clapping as Reverend Lawson took the podium. He waved his hand above the crowd and a calm came over them.

He took his handkerchief from his pocket and wiped his forehead. “Ohhhhhhhhhh yeah,” he suddenly shouted loudly. Nate looked and saw quite a few people other than himself jump. “If you didn’t come to feel the Word this morning, then you better run.” He repeated himself. “I said, if you didn’t come to feel it deep down in your soul then you better run.”

“Amen,” in unison.

“I don’t need to introduce myself. Ya’ll know me and you know how I do it.”

“Till it can’t be done no mo’,” answered someone.

“That’s right,” Reverend Lawson replied and he went on to offer prayers, sing a solo, and then he sang with the choir before he began his sermon.

Nate had either forgotten or never witnessed a pastor take command of the emotions and hearts of a congregation the way that Reverend Lawson did. If nothing more, he was entertained. He’d mainly come to the service out of respect for Larry, whom, up to the moment he donned the robes, Nate thought was only a personal trainer. The other part of him came out of curiosity. He wondered if he was missing something. He had known church folks all his life, folks who swore that the Word had changed their lives. His curiosity was about to be satisfied.

“Can I ask you all a question?” The church was silent. “Is it me, or is it hot as heck in here?” He laughed as he wiped his brow. “Seriously, though, I’m so happy to be here.” He paused and looked over the crowd and then held up a few papers. “I was going to preach to you today from these notes. I had a nice sermon prepared for you with lots of scriptural relevance. I guarantee you would have been impressed…but I received a last-second order from the Father.”

The church was quiet until someone yelled out, “It’s all right with me.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” Reverend Lawson answered. “You see someone here today is in need of the healing powers, the strength, and the direction of the Kingdom. In this particular situation, there can be no mistaking. You all understand.” He wiped his brow.

“Yes, sir.”

“I don’t need anyone”—the tone of his voice rose up—“wondering if in fact the message today was indeed intended for them.” He shook his head no. “No, we don’t need that. We need a direct hit. We need a message so clear that there will be no mistaking.”

“No mistakes. Amen,” came from the choir.

“Someone needs to know that it’s okay to wander in from the wilderness. It doesn’t matter that you’ve been lost all this time. We’ve been waiting for you. So many of our young are afraid to start where they are…to change a day at a time. Understand that God will accept you today as you are. The only thing that he won’t supply you with is an excuse.”

Nate’s eyes grew blurry and he began to make eye contact with the reverend. The message was hitting home and Nate was struggling with the feelings that were coming over him. He had never felt anything like the electricity running through his body. Reverend Lawson was now talking directly to him and Nate could no longer make out any other sounds or movements around him. “Oh ye’, I understand that you’re still young. I’m still young myself.” He stepped back and waved his hand to the drummer. The drummer kicked a quick beat and Reverend Lawson eased back from the pulpit and did the chicken-head dance that Chingy made famous, then he switched up and hit the Crip-walk across the podium to the beat.

The church erupted, especially the young members of the congregation. “That’s right,” a yell came.

“Do it, Rev.”

Reverend Lawson continued, “I understand that it’s tough to walk the right path. But have you even considered it? I ask you all to take a look at how you been living your lives, because your Creator already has. He has already forgiven you, he just wants you to take advantage of his mercy.”

“Aaaaaaaamen.”

“Ecclesiastes Twelve, ‘Remember, now, your Grand Creator in the days of your young manhood, before the calamitous days proceed to come, or the years have arrived when you will say: “I have no delight in them.”’” His brow was sweating and he wiped only a few drops away. “Don’t let it come to that, young people.”

Reverend Lawson continued on, and by the time he finished his sermon, Nate was holding back the tears. The choir sang “God Can and Will” slowly in the background as Reverend Lawson rocked back and forth. His voice was soothing as he made promises to everyone in the house. He told them of the peace that God had in store for them. “One step toward him and he’ll take two steps toward you,” Reverend Lawson said. “Is there anyone out there who is willing to accept Jesus Christ as their savior today? Don’t be afraid to start where you are. Come on up, HE has been waiting for you.” One by one, a few people made their way out of their seats.

Janette was standing along with everyone else. She was filled with joy, but she wasn’t ready to make her way to the front. She was, however, shocked when Nate released her hand and walked out of the pew and up to the altar to surrender his life, his fears, and his guilt.

It was amazing. Amazing Grace.