CHAPTER THREE
Mrs Klompet Caves In

Still thinking,’ Rosie repeated calmly for possibly the sixth time that morning. This was in response to her daughter’s incessant questioning as to whether she had arrived at a decision regarding the Lampo Circus. ‘Just bear in mind that I think better when I’m not being badgered,’ Rosie added.

The circus was putting on its opening performance that very morning and Milli had not yet been permitted to go! What had got into her usually liberal parents? Mrs Perriclof had not expressed reservations of any sort and she was the type of mother who diarised daily sugar intake! But Mrs Klompet suddenly wanted answers to all sorts of things. How long had the Lampo Circus been operating? Were they a licensed company? What had made them decide to come to a small and out-of-the-way town like Drabville? What was Mr Lampo’s personal history? Milli could neither answer nor see the relevance of any of these questions, but with Mr Klompet siding categorically with his wife, the decision appeared to be final.

When Ernest arrived at the house in his best trousers and a bow tie, the news that Milli would not be accompanying him left him thoroughly downcast. Milli was his best friend and going to the circus without her would be no fun at all. As a display of solidarity, Ernest decided on a noble course of action. If Milli was prohibited from going, then he would make the ultimate sacrifice of abstaining and share with her the deprivation. If this heartless decision was going to cause psychological damage in the long run, then they would be damaged together. He couldn’t allow Milli to go through something like that alone. Milli tried to talk sense into him but Ernest remained steadfast in his decision.

Touched by this loyalty, Milli resolved to spend every waking hour of the following week with Ernest. After all, they didn’t need the Lampo Circus. They had never had any trouble entertaining themselves before. To keep their minds off what they might be missing, they decided to invent a new and outlandish game that would go down in Klompet and Perriclof history.

But invention was no easy task with their concentration regularly interrupted by reports of the circus and its wonders. In the days that followed, Drabville came to resemble a ghost town. Usually responsible people packed picnic baskets and spent entire days idling on the village green. The news of the circus spread like wildfire and it seemed as if an invisible Out of Order sign had been plastered over everything. Theatre performances were cancelled until further notice, birthday celebrations were rescheduled, wedding ceremonies postponed, and even the Drabville Bank’s annual Invest and Jest party, which had taken place on the same date for ninety-five years, was shifted on the calendar!

There wasn’t a single shop that still welcomed customers through its doors. Every retailer, traffic warden and postman in town had been granted a holiday. People were forced to bake their own bread as the bakery staff had taken immediate leave, citing ‘family reasons’ for their absence. For the week that Lampo and his circus were in town, the children were only required to attend half-days at school. If any parents were disgruntled about this, there wasn’t much they could do as all school staff had absconded to the village green where the circus had set up camp. The only living organism to be found in the classrooms each afternoon was the mould growing on rejected bananas that had been buried behind pot plants and lockers. Milli and Ernest could not even seek refuge in the library because Miss Linear had taped a Closed Until Further Notice sign to the entrance. This was unheard of, as it was her personal philosophy to keep the library doors open through ‘hail, sleet and snow’ as she liked to put it.

The circus arrived on Monday, and by Wednesday there was not a single soul who had not seen the show. In fact, most had seen it more than once because the acts varied from day to day. Milli and Ernest heard painstakingly detailed accounts of the incredible feats performed inside the tent and the magical treats that could be purchased there. The more they heard, the more tormented they became. They found they did not have the enthusiasm to slip into one of their games, and even visiting the ruins of Hog House had lost its appeal. Their thoughts drifted inevitably towards the circus during every conversation. It really could not be helped when there was nothing (not even school) to fill the long hours of the day and serve as a distraction.

According to reports, Ringmaster Lampo was an instant success with the town’s children. He kept all manner of tricks and treats in the oversized pockets of his waistcoat which he gave away readily to those lucky enough to be in closest proximity. As for the grown-ups, Lampo regaled them with tales of circus history dating back to ancient times. And he never failed to inquire with interest after their own town affairs, which they were more than happy to gabble endlessly about. Although Milli and Ernest had never laid eyes on the ringmaster, they were already beginning to dislike him and his blasted circus which had excluded them so wholly from their own community.

The week stretched on interminably, rather like sitting in an algebra lesson when the teacher is talking about quadratic trinomials. But still Mrs Klompet remained unyielding. She tried to make up for it by setting aside extra time for Family Capers, but Milli refused to participate. The tension in the household mounted. As more tales of the circus reached them with each new day, Milli became more and more resentful until she could think of nothing else. Even Stench sensed her mood and tried to be as inconspicuous as possible for fear of being accidentally trodden on or banished outside.

In Bauble Lane, Ernest was faring no better. He was being teased (more than usual) by his younger siblings, who, unable to comprehend his decision to stay away from the circus, ridiculed it. When he wasn’t with Milli, Ernest spent most of his time holed up in his bedroom brainstorming synonyms for ‘injustice’ to add to his lexicon. He even took to having his meals in his room as listening to the family’s excited chatter about the marvels of the Lampo Circus had begun to interfere with his digestion.

On the morning of the circus’s last day in town, Milli and Ernest decided to go for a stroll at an abnormally early hour to avoid running into what they had dismissively dubbed ‘circus fanatics’. They were looking forward to the Lampo Circus packing up and moving on so they could put the whole beastly experience behind them and recover some of the popularity they had now come to miss. Quite by chance they ran into two unexpected people. A pair of young circus performers in green tights and spangled capes were back-flipping their way down Drabville’s main street, looking as flexible as if their bones were made of rubber. They stopped every now and then to paste flyers on lampposts and shopfronts.

When the two reached Milli and Ernest, they came to a halt. They were a girl and boy who seemed to be about the children’s own age, with burnished red hair, freckled noses and startlingly blue eyes. They gazed at Milli and Ernest as if they did not often meet other children and were unsure how to behave. The boy smiled awkwardly while the girl shuffled her feet.

As usual, Milli took the initiative.

‘Hello,’ she said. ‘I’m Milli and this is my friend, Ernest. What are you doing out so early?’

‘I could ask the same of you,’ the boy retorted spiritedly, before formally introducing himself. ‘I’m Finn and this is my twin sister, Fennel. We’re Lampo acrobats.’

His sister smiled shyly, then did an impressive double somersault before shaking their hands. The children could not help liking the twins immediately. How providential to run into a couple of Lampo’s actual stars. It was the closest to the circus the children could expect to get thanks to Milli’s intractable mother.

‘Have you seen the show?’ Finn asked.

‘Not as yet, but we’re hoping to,’ Milli fibbed. ‘You both seem very talented.’

The twins beamed at the compliment.

‘Well, we have to practise every day,’ Finn said.

‘Are your parents in the circus too?’ Ernest wanted to know.

‘They were,’ Fennel said softly. ‘We’re orphans.’

‘I’m terribly sorry,’ said Ernest, conscious that he had made a faux pas.

‘It’s okay. The circus is our family now,’ said Fennel.

‘Is Ringmaster Lampo as wonderful as everyone says he is?’ Milli asked.

The pause that followed this question was a touch too long. The girl seemed to pale a little and stole a sidelong glance at her brother.

‘Federico Lampo looks after us all,’ said Finn. ‘Please excuse us now, but we must finish this task.’ They both bowed politely before spinning on the balls of their feet and cartwheeling their way down the street.

Milli frowned as she watched Finn and Fennel go. There was something odd about their behaviour. She had not missed their sudden downcast eyes when Lampo’s name was mentioned. Milli knew from experience that you could deduce a great deal by what people did with their eyes when asked a simple question. The twins had been unsure where to look. Perhaps this meant there would be repercussions if they were late in completing their assignment. Of course, Milli could not be sure of this, and she hoped she was wrong as they seemed such gentle and unassuming children.

Not wishing to delay them further, Milli did not call after them but instead detached one of their notices from a nearby lamppost.